It doesn’t need to be any kind of secret, my confidence is shaken, and I’m a bit crestfallen about University of Chicago, a school I’d really fond feelings about until recently.
I’m a bit lost right now, not quite sure what I want to do. For the longest time I was sure I was ready to play the power game, but now I sort of think that I don’t care that much. It begins to feel like the time in Alaska in an RV (that’s the plan anyway) will be more than just “time before school” as it was before.
I don’t know. It’s not like I can afford anything right now anyway.
I do need to keep my eyes on the prize JUST a little bit longer though, and be sure to get SOME sort of applications pile submitted, so that I have options if I arrive at a-year-from-now and realize that I really, really, really do want to go back to school.
But for the moment mostly I want to wake up to grey mornings in the middle of nowhere and trudge off through dewey, green foliage with a camera in my hand, a diet soda in my back pocket, and a few memories floating through my head to keep me company.
In the meantime, I can offer all of the youngsters the following advice about school:
– School is a way out of jobs, but it still leaves you needing a way out of school
– All schools are either friendly-but-unimpressive or impressive-but-bourgeois
– Always pick up and save all of your papers, no matter what
– Decide early if you are going to play the power game
– If you are, don’t indulge in silly classes, PLAY THE GAME, because you’re competing
and also the following advice about life:
– It takes all kinds, but only a few kinds aren’t isolated and/or have the joy of others’ company
– We first killed God and then we killed science; now we have nothing
– You can therefore use anything you like as scripture, so find meaning where you will
– But you must stipulate that others will think you inferior/crazy/evil
– You will miss things, all the time, painfully
– You will not have them back
– You will drink a lot of coffee, a lot of soda, and a lot of alcohol
– You will never have enough dewey, green foliage with camera in hand mornings,