you can not get up no matter what you do? You feel almost as though you’re dying; you open your eyes and try to sit up and you weigh a million pounds, parts of you do something somewhere between hurting and stinging; it feels as though you don’t have the energy to hold yourself up and you’re going to collapse; and then you do, right back down, helpless, immediately back into sleep.
I went to take a nap at noon. It is now 5:30. I tried to get up at approximately 1:30, 2:00, 4:00, and 4:45 (there is a huge clock next to my bed, so I can easily see the time when I’m laying down).
Meanwhile, it is 80 degrees in here and I am hot as hell, sweating, overheated.
I have been unable to get up all day, and I have had dreams. Such dreams. Over and over again, the same themes. And then I open my eyes, am unable to get up, and fall back into new ones of the same variety. I have truly had a day of fevered dreams.