How can I know whether it’s the right thing? The calculation depends in part on our own approach to the very calculation.
We were on top of the entire world and now we’re going to claw our way straight back to the bottom? Why? Is it really the only way? Is it really best?
I go back and forth.
Some moments I can’t see any other way.
Other moments I want to break every window I see, to yell at the top of my lungs that this is the most stupid thing I’ve ever done.
But then immediately after that sensation passes, I go back to feeling as though this is the only thing that makes sense, as if there is no other option and I have to take it wherever it goes, come what may, or simply give up on my life altogether.