Leapdragon 2016 - Aron Hsiao Was Here

Things in the Poconos  §

© Pocono Candle

The Poconos are full of hurricanes and New Yorkers fleeing hurricanes.

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There are no places in the Poconos, only trees and spaces-in-between.

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If you want to buy a bottle of beer in the Poconos, you must climb to the top of a hill beside a two-employee airport where you’ll find the only place in town that has a little beer fridge—an ancient Chinese restaurant.

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In the Poconos, mechanics want to be your friend and they offer to call you and invite you to places and to help you with your personal problems.

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In the Poconos, you’ll find stores that specialize entirely in candles, with over 12 rooms full of candles, surrounded mostly by forest. They will ask if you dog wants water and offer you free fudge.

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In the Poconos, you’ll find little strip malls in the middle of endless tracks of nowhere containing only day care centers and halal food.

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In the Poconos, your motel room comes with free cotton swabs, though you have to organize them yourself.

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In the Poconos, you will lose precious time, which seems to be what every small town on earth is really for.

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In the Poconos, you will have a great time, despite missing your family dearly and being, by all objective measures, in a long-forgotten corner of the universe.