Saturday night—a legendary segment of time, canonized by fiction and nonfiction alike. My memories of “Saturday nights” now? Either gone or all of children and sleep, depending on how you want to define “memories.”
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Visited my sister and her husband at their new house today. Interesting experience. It’s quite nice and it’s quite large. I’m not sure it’s for me, but my wife is quite sure it would be for her.
The irony (problem?) here is of course that we have no such house and no such stability. I’m not sure I ever wanted it, but it’s clear that my wife does and did.
These are the “sacrifices” that are meant when people talk talk about the “sacrifices” involved in getting a Ph.D. Other people go on living their lives. Yours is in stasis, in a way—you’re still in school and you have been for years or even decades, and your financial situation is worse than many around you that are ostensibly less experienced and working in conventionally less admired fields.
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It’s important to maintain a sense of urgency about life.
Or, if you lose your sense of urgency for more than a moment or two, you’d better think about getting off the career train you’re on and doing something else.
Because without a sense of urgency, you’re not going anywhere but down if you aren’t standing on a firm foundation or building one already.
Good to be reminded of this, to have my sense of urgency renewed.
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I really hate these “what do you want out of life” moments, because they make it difficult on people that share lives.
Few people want precisely the same things all around out of life. So long as things are moving quickly enough, no one notices the disparities involved.
When things get a bit bogged down, though, everyone begins to ask themselves where they are going. That’s a risky proposition for individuals in couplehood, one that makes everyone a bit sad and a bit uncomfortable.
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Would I like to live in my sister’s house, if it were mine?
Hard to say.
But I would like my wife to be more satisfied with our life and I would like to know more about what the future holds for my young children in terms of life, places, and routines.
This Ph.D. needs to get done, and yesterday.
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There will be a shift in strategy beginning with the first workday of next week. It’s time for a “big push.”