Salt Lake City makes me more aggressive, more taut.
No holiday spirit here. Not yet. I’m happy to visit w/the family, of course, but in a way I feel like I did all last year… like I’m waiting to leave for school. I don’t really know what to do with myself or who to see. Old temptations begin to come back. I don’t want to call anybody yet. It’s pretty cold right now… well below freezing… I haven’t been to the island yet.
There is liberation in capitulation… isn’t there now…?
Sometimes I think I’m much more self-centered than even I realize.
I shall be free.