Yes, there is always tomorrow. But action (or inaction) can occur only today.
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SENIOR INFORMATION SYSTEMS ARCHITECT/MANAGER/DEVELOPER: The hottest web startup in the business is seeking an experienced/senior developer and information systems architect with god-like expertise in C, C++, C#, Objective-C, Pascal, FORTH, COBOL, Fortran, HTML/XHTML, CSS, JavaScript, Java, Perl, SQL (both MySQL and DB2 and the transaction atomicity/commit behavior of each), Python, PHP, AJAX techniques and Web 2.0 best practices, Ruby on Rails, ASP.NET and legacy/integrated hosting environments, UNIX/Linux, Windows, and Mac OS platforms. Expertise in simulating legacy supercomputing architectures in FPGAs a plus, particularly if such experience includes ad-hoc interfaces to legacy 9-track reel-to-reel magnetic tape storage systems. Experience in LED and OLED production environments also a plus. Ability to whistle at 1200 baud and to translate manually in real time between Ethernet and Token Ring state streams would be a great bonus. Requirements: Masters degree in information technology, information systems, computer science, or related field. 7-10 years senior development experience as a project and team leader with full project management, budget, team leadership, and oversight responsibilities. A demonstrated ability drive roadmap development, specification and implementation protocols and processes, evaluation and QA metrics, user testing regimes, and to successfully manage and evaluate subordinate team members on an ongoing basis. Spotless, rapid coding and knowledge of current coding best practices essential. Previous experience in senior management also essential. Fortune 500 or Fortune 100 information systems architecting and oversight experience would be extremely helpful. COMPENSATION: $10.50-12.00/hour, DOE. This is a contract/freelance position with the potential for possible temp-to-hire status in the future.
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INTERNATIONAL NGO SEEKS EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR: The Social Institute for the Advancement of Civil Society in the Public Interest, United States Office (SIACSPI-USO) is currently seeking an experienced executive to take over daily operations of USO and to realign its operating properties with the recently reissued mission statement of the International Division (SIACSPI-ID). The successful candidate will have 10+ years of nongovernmental organizational management experience at the executive level and will oversee all aspects of the USO, including but not limited to: financial, funding, and budgets management; maintenance of relationships to major (incl. Fortune 500) donors; creation and implementation of short- and long-term strategy with respect to ID mission statement and directives as issued; personnel and human resources management; technology and infrastructure management; public communication and public relations for USO; compliance oversight with regard to all relevant domestic and international regulations. Background in international relations, military affairs, poverty and human development, AIDS and AIDS activism, animal rights, free market advocacy a plus, intellectual property law, and cultural and religious exchange at the state/diplomatic level required. SIACSPI-USO does not discriminate on the basis of age, sex, color, ethnicity, or physical ability. COMPENSATION: This is an unpaid internship of indefinite duration; renewal of the position will be reconsidered annually as part of the yearly performance evaluation from the SIACSPI-ID directorate executive board.
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WORK FROM HOME UP TO $15,000 DAILY: Need a little extra income in this tough market? Ready to quit your day job and work from home? Make anywhere up to $15,000 daily GUARANTEED as a television critic/writer. TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST OF YOUR LIFE and you should spend it making anywhere up to your FIRST $15,000. We have high school kids, stay-at-home moms, retirees, and persons with disabilities all making anywhere up to $15,000 a day FROM HOME, SITTING IN THEIR LIVING ROOMS writing articles about their favorite soap operas, reality television programs, news broadcasts, and variety shows. YOU CAN DO IT, TOO! NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY! Even if you are not a writer already, most people actually have an INBORN ABILITY TO WRITE WELL! This PROBABLY INCLUDES YOU! It’s easy, and ANYONE CAN DO IT! Income of anywhere up to $15,000 A DAY IS FULLY GUARANTEED. Join the growing list of television viewers making anywhere up to $15,000 A DAY FROM HOME BY WATCHING TV! Here’s how to begin: we send you a list of REAL NEWSPAPERS AND MAGAZINES that are ready to consider buying YOUR ARTICLES. You WATCH TV and WRITE ABOUT YOUR FAVORITE SHOWS! When a client likes what you’ve written, they’ll pay you anywhere up to $1,000 PER ARTICLE OR MORE! It’s THAT EASY! That means that if you watch 15 programs per day, you’ll make anywhere up to $15,000 A DAY OR MORE, GUARANTEED! Remember, many people are natural-born writers already, and these publications are HUNGRY AND WAITING for articles that PEOPLE LIKE YOU can write! DON’T BE LEFT BEHIND! START TODAY earning anywhere up to $15,000 A DAY just like the many high school kids, stay-at-home moms, retirees, and persons with disabilities that have ALREADY RESPONDED to our job postings! ALL IT TAKES IS YOUR TELEVISION VIEWING TIME and one low payment of $49.95, which covers the costs of our EASY TO USE instructional materials and a comprehensive list of newspapers and magazines where you can market YOUR ARTICLES for anywhere up to $1,000 EACH OR MORE, or in other words anywhere up to $15,000 A DAY OR EVEN MORE, depending on how much TV you’re willing to watch. THE SKY IS THE LIMIT! CALL TODAY, 1-800-MEGA-BUX, and earn anywhere up to $15,000 A DAY STARTING TOMORROW! NO EXPERIENCE, RESUME, OR REFERENCES NECESSARY! This is a SERIOUS OPPORTUNITY for SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY. We have a LIMITED NUMBER OF SLOTS to help new writers get started, so DON’T DELAY! Please have your VISA, MasterCard, Discover card, or American Express card ready when you call.
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MILITARY/SECURITY CONTRACTOR SEEKS A FEW BRIGHT PEOPLE: Do you love to be where the action is? We are a prominent military/security contractor with competitive pay and benefits seeking strong, fit, young adventurous people to operate WHERE THE ACTION IS at the highest levels, with security clearances and field command possibilities. Must be willing to travel extensively during 23 out of 24 months. Ability to converse in Arabic, Urdu, Russian, or Chinese a plus. Previous experience handing assault weapons, body armor, and other tactical gear a strong plus; FORMER SWAT, THIS MEANS YOU! State of the art equipment, full medical benefits, and ongoing tactical assault/defense/special ops training and retraining provided. WE DON’T JUST BUILD LEADERS; WE BUILD SUPERMEN. COMPENSATION: $250,000-$400,000 annually, plus benefits, DOE and score on qualifying tactical skills tests. If you’re ready for an EXCITING career on the FRONT LINES of tomorrow, don’t wait; send resume, cover letter, and signed bodily injury and legal liability release form (available on our website) for consideration.
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What happened to all of the “normal” jobs, and what happened to “normal” work for “normal” pay to live a “normal” life?
The social construction of normalcy has fallen into disrepair even as normalcy has fallen into comparative disrepute. In its place, we have entertainment passing for real life.