– Who I am
– What it means to be me
– Whether I will ever be okay with this
– What the problem is, exactly
– Why everything
It has been this way as long as I can remember. Nobody is happy. Everybody is happy. Nothing works. Everything works. And then nothing works again. And then everybody regrets it and wonders if there was a way to make everything work.
I think it comes down to: some people were born in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or rather, some people were socialized by parents to function in a different place and a different time.
It will never, ever be quite right. I know this by now.
I just hope it can be tolerable.
How do I feel?
Half cheetah, half gazelle.
Half policeman, half bank robber.
Half cancer, half chemotherapy.
Half exterminator, half cockroach.
We are all . fundamentally . alone .